Lingerie Blog

I am a hopeless romantic or as I prefer to say, a really “hopeful” one. Love, sex and romance—they all go together nicely if you are lucky. If you are like the rest of us, however, some parts of the equation go a little caddywompus at times. Getting the love game just right doesn’t always work out as easily as it should which kind of confuses me. It seems to me that falling (and staying) in love should be the most natural and easy thing to do in the world. Falling in love is almost too easy—but that my friend is only the beginning. First comes the freefall and then things tend to get somewhat complicated.

When I was younger it was expected of me that I would grow up, get married, have a bunch of babies and live happily ever after. No one ever talked about the aftermath that comes subsequent to getting married. The focus was primarily on the “getting there” and making the right choice for a mate. I just assumed that once all the prerequisites were met, the rest would be smooth sailing. My parents were also very involved and quite vocal about their approval or disapproval of any and all males that were in my life at that time. It became obvious after awhile that if I didn’t want to hear their opinions I needed to lay low and say nothing to them. It seemed that what made me the most happy often had a very different effect on mom and dad. Whose love life was this anyway? A relationship would work beautifully for me—but for them, sometimes it just didn’t. Those conflicts were only the beginning.

Eventually, (and with little bloodshed) I did get married and had a few babies too. I do wonder (c’mon—don’t we all?) at times what has happened to the love, sex and romance that got us into this mess in the first place. Has all that been replaced with something that Homer Simpson described as (okay I’ve reached a new low here…) “a lot like a coffin. And each kid is an extra nail.” So where’d all the sexy stuff go, anyway? Is love and romance just a bunch of smoke and mirrors that blinds innocent romantics into making a legal contract that kills us oh… so… slowly? What has happened to married bliss? Is it really a myth or with a bit of effort can it still exist?

I know I sound jaded but I’m really not. As I said when I started writing this I am a hopeful romantic and I really do love being in love. It’s staying in that state of being that tends to be the tricky part and if you have been married more than a few years you know I speak the truth. Marriage is not for the faint of heart—it takes a lot of work to keep that love buzz going. A successful marriage isn’t something that comes easily for most of us but I do believe that most of the time the effort put into your marriage put comes back to you ten fold. Marriage is a worthy (not a completely lost) cause.

They say that marriage has 3 phases. Lust, rust then dust. I don’t think it has to be that way, perhaps have we just gotten really lazy about doing what it takes to keep the romance alive. Is it possible to put life and love back into a relationship that has gone a bit stale? Maybe sometimes it’s as simple as choosing our battles more wisely, and not killing what’s still alive and beating hard within us. Every relationship has its ebbs and flows—and admittedly some really dour duos should probably just call it a day. Whether your life’s path should be taken solo or you’re better off as part a pair—it’s never easy and it’s never going to be fair. I do know that I don’t want to go through life alone and whether I’m married or not–I’m most happy when there is someone willing to put up with me even when things get ugly. I can’t stop hoping for the happy ending—even the handsome prince that will take me away from it all on his glistening white steed. He might actually be closer than I think. Some might say I have an overly vivid imagination. I would just say I still believe in love.